A lot of stuffs to be settled recently which really pressuring me...each pressure from everything different little things added up bcome big big huge pressure...
1.FYP. memang lack of time to finish it coz the advisor return it bck to us late...
2. Grandpa fall sick.Grandma beat the maid and make a lot of "noise" in my cousin's house which affected my cousins to prepare for their PMR and SPM..then both cousins 's emotion kena influenced as well till the family very "noisy"...You might ask, "is their any relation to you, reb? coz they are ur granparents and cousins only...you should care for ur own responsibility.." Ya, this is my responsibility..coz i hv to take care of them as well...Grandparents sayang me very much..automatically, when something happened to both of them ..the aunts and uncles will asked me to advise them, console them etc...cousins trust on me and we hv gd relationship..when something happened2 them, for sure aunts and uncles including my family members will asked me to help them and guide them...@@ and i jz solved this problem only but still will catch up the rest "storyline"..
3.I received a call from Sarah yesterday and jz realized my parents quarreling again in the morning...after quarrel, dad went bck home alone and vomit blood..then , he called my mum ...mum called my both sis who r hving holiday..then sarah called my dad and asked how was he...and dad bck to previous "case" where he don1 2 speak any word and jz "hibernate' himself without going to see doctor etc...My elder sis asked Sarah to tell me these and ask me to settle it..@@ For sure, i'm sad when heard they were quarreling again ;worry when knew dad vomit blood; disappointed when both sis called me to settled all these yet they didnt..Parents didnt honest to me on what happened yesterday coz they knew i will angry and scold them for their childishness...Wondering when can everything be settled? asking myself am i the eldest among the siblings or the 2nd? where is my elder sis? why i'm the one who hv to face and solve family's problems? why everything seem hv to push to me when anything happened? They asked me bck every time when something happened though i'm in kampar...what if i started my job in KL? KL is very far from sp leh compare to kampar...how? takan 1 me 2 bck everytime? wen can i release from the burdan? When can my family members be mature a bit? when can my elder sis take up the responsibility? Arrrr~~~~
4. Sarah keep asking me to get sumtime to bring her to KL for holiday..but honestly, i'm very blur with the front "road"...i did plan for it, but seem like it clash with my actual plan..then my bro cant gv me a confirmation on whether he can come to kampar to bring my stuffs up to KL...everything stuck over there..but still hv to make decision..@@ i'm very confusing and blur now...once i knw the plan, i can also confirm when for interview edi...hopefully, i can hv a clear plan soon..
5.worry and fear for the future ...i hv no direction honestly..it is so scary when u donno where u 1 2 go, which is the best for u...@@ still learn to rely on Him...God, help me...
6. Many people asking for the "decision" from different aspect..all memang pressuring me...and i jz made another "decision" yesterday night...
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Sometime, i really think that i'm a superwoman...=P hahaha
but i really need rest honestly...i still need some fresh air de....
and i wish to hv it immediately...
sometime thinking and fancying ...someone is helping me and bearing all the responsibility with me...hahah...
jz fancying la...=P
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